In my last post, I discussed the trigger cycle and defined the types of triggers I believe exists. Kind of putting a name to the behavior. This post will discuss different things that you can do to prepare for potential triggers as well as what to do when in the midst of an episode.
Your body will often warn you that your trigger is being activated. You may suddenly get flushed, your heart starts beating fast, some may even have their voice or body tremble as this is occurring. It’s at this exact moment that self awareness is so important. You see, what’s happening during this moment is your physical reaction to the fight or flight response. Whether fight or flight, the physical approach is the same; the difference lays in where your mind is at when this is happening.
If your thoughts are to run or remove yourself from the situation you are in flight mode. This can sometimes happen with The Rubbing Alcohol Trigger. These seem to happen more so when the situation has the potential to stir up violence. Someone intentionally trying to pick a fight with you; like the gaping wound trigger folks can do. In this case, their desire to fight actually has nothing to do with you at all; they are an energetic pressure cooker looking for the steam valve. They think that fighting will make them feel better and it does, but usually only temporarily before the shame cycle steps in.
Either way, if you find yourself in a Rubbing Alcohol Trigger situation, listen to your body; you want to leave for a reason. The flight response saves lives, don’t ignore this one.
When your mental state has you in a place where you want to curb check the person/issue, for example; you are in a fight response. THIS is the response to pay attention to in regards to your triggers.
The tricky thing about the fight response is that there are just a few seconds in this process that can make the difference between an assault charge and an ascension lesson. It’s the tipping point. To recognize this moment, you must be able to slow down long enough to observe this moment. Here are some of the tips that I have used over the years to help me achieve this level of awareness.
#1 Meditation- This is the top recommendation I make to anyone who is looking to get into a deeper relationship with their higher self. Slowing down the mind allows you to be intentional about observing your thoughts and also what comes out of your mouth. I still struggle with that second part; flying off at the mouth is kind of my specialty.
It’s a little intimidating to really be aware of how connected the emotions and the body are. The amazing thing is that you don’t need to be a meditation master to be able to pick up these changes in yourself when faced with a trigger. I noticed a small difference in awareness after just 2- 15 minute sessions over the period of a week. It’s almost as if the more you meditate and the deeper you get into this practice, the more your response time improves when faced with these situations.
The other great thing is that even if you fall off the meditation practice, you don’t lose what you’ve learned about yourself but I’ve personally noticed that when I fall off, my response time is not as good when faced with situations that can cause triggers in me.
Either way, consider meditation like prep work to pass the tests of life.
#2 Deep Breathing Exercises- When I say breathing exercises, I’m not talking about counting backwards from 10 in the heat of the moment; although, this can sometimes help. The breathing that I am talking about is done from the belly with the intent to slow yourself down. This allows the adrenaline to also slow down which means no assault charge for you. YAY!
Deep breathing allows you to slow down enough to navigate through the fight or flight response so that your response is a balanced one instead of knee-jerk. I find this one to be particularly helpful when I know I’m about to fly off at the mouth.
Now, deep breathing is not the same as meditation, at least not in my mind. Meditation requests that you eliminate all thoughts to be present in the current moment. Deep breathing exercises are implemented when you want to slow down your thoughts. You’re not getting rid of them, just putting them in slowmotion.
#3 Mantras- Repeating a mantra to yourself can feel kind of silly when you first get started. I’ll admit it; I felt like a complete whackadoodle staring at myself in the mirror every morning and reciting my mantra at the start. However, this became a nearly effortless routine for me to implement in my everyday and became so significant that It was noticeable how my mood changed when I didn’t do it.
Mantras, however, are not just restricted to morning routines. In fact, they don’t even have to be said out loud. I noticed a difference saying them out loud but I was also staring at myself in the privacy of my own bathroom; use your discretion. When faced with the scenario to say a mantra or make someone see cartoon stars, the mantra can truly help and is possibly the most effortless thing you can do to redirect your energy.
You can make up your own or use another that you resonate with. Either way, mantras are an excellent way to shift your mindset providing a de-escalation trigger of sorts. If you’re having trouble with the concept on this one, I’ll share one of mine that I still use to this day:
“I refuse to give power to anything that disturbs my peace”POACreator
You’ll see the word peace a lot throughout these posts and on my channel. I even end 99% of of my videos stating that ” your peace is your power” and this is because out of all the lessons I’ve had to personally endure in regards to triggers; the most significant one was that it’s a better use of my energy to invest in myself than to pop off on someone.
Often, some people are just trying to get a rise out of you because they feel small around you and placating their shadow is not something worth wasting your time on, . It’s like, dude; I have my own shadow to work on so Ima just keep it pushin’, It’s not my job to wake up people sleeping on me, it’s my job to wake myself up; ya digg? Other times, you just happen to be in the right place at the wrong time and the person you’re dealing with woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Happens to the best of us. Either way, I’ve personally learned to not take the side eyes and backwards comments about anything to heart anymore but it took a very long time to get to this state. Mantras made me a well seasoned cast-iron skillet so to speak, like the one passed down from your great grandparents. We all know that very little sticks to a well seasoned cast-iron skillet; marinate on that for a moment and you’ll understand why I didn’t say Teflon.
#4 Quotes- One of my favorite places to look for inspiration and expansion of knowledge is books. Regardless of genre, when you close a finished book you should in someway feel something. Not all books have the ability to do that but the ones that do will give you quotes that you’ll easily be able to recall when things get tough. I include quotes a lot. Most of them are from books that I’ve read or some excerpt from an author but some I just simply resonate with what is being stated. You can do the very same thing. A good way to find these quotes is to get your head in a book or better yet, go down the rabbit hole on the topic of your choice.
Lately, I find myself being pulled more and more towards a guy named Joseph Cambell. I’ve yet to read anything by this man but at least 5 quotes of his are in my journal because they just resonate SO MUCH.
Make no mistake, Mr. Campbell will make it onto my summer reading list.
The same thing happened with Khalil Gibran at the beginning of my journey; here’s my favorite from him:
” You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts…”Khalil Gibran, The Prophet
#5 Music- This one is tricky because if you’re not careful, the music can make your mental mood worse so when it comes to the tunes, definitely use your discretion. Generally, what I have done in the past is gone for music makes me want to shake my peach versus belt to the rooftops, AKA Dance Party In My Living Room where I pretend I’m on tour or choreographing a music video. Yo, I used to record music videos back when MTV actually played music; I was THAT 90’s kid so music and the dance party were my thing long before Meredith and Christina would dance it out full of Tequila on Grey’s Anatomy.
This one seems like it would be a lot of fun to get the whole family to do at the end of a rough week too. I suspect that this is where Meredith Grey got this from. I personally have never been able to dance and stay in a crap mood. It seems physically impossible.
Music is the ultimate medicine for anything and the more it makes you want to move the better. You don’t have to be a good dancer to do this, you could not know how to count time whatsoever and still twerk till your heart is content.
Well that’s it for trigger tips and tricks. My next post will break down this trigger thang even further when we look into what I like to call, ‘The Why Cycle’.
Till then, Your peace is your power.